I'm feeling sort of sad today and don't know what to do about it. It's mostly the result of being on the tail-end of sick and feeling lonely. I saw a bunch of my good friends this weekend. We haven't all been together in about two years. It was such a wonderful time, but made me very sad to come home. I miss those times. The year that we all were inseperable was easily the best year of my life. The only thing that will top that is when I can be with Justin in person for more than a temporary visit.

I find myself evaluating who I am now, compared to who I was then (when all my friends lived here). We've all changed, but not as much as I thought. The core of our friendship was still as strong as ever and I miss who I was then as well. We all need people. It's not good for anyone to be alone all the time. I, more than anyone else in the entire world, can attest to that. It's hard to be happy when the best times of your life are behind you and in front of you, but not happening right now. It's a tough balancing act to continually feel loss and hope at the same time.

So, needy Stacey really wants someone to reach out to her right now. The attempts I've made today weren't very fruitful, due to nobody's fault, it's just that life happens. Lawnwork needs to be done, bar needs to be tended, naps need to be taken. Three strikes is my maximum, so I settled for some time by the lake. Now I'm home as the "kids" are out for a couple hours and think I'm going to go veg. on the living room couch so as to avoid thinking for a while. I suspect I'll go back to the lake this evening...although unpacking would make more sense. I really dislike things undone.

Ho-hum.